For the Lord gives, and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding. (Prov. 2:6)
Growing up I hated when my dad made me read Proverbs and its profound ideas on life, at the age of twelve it seemed lame. Now here I am nine years later starting off a blog with a passage from Solomon's greatest written work. This particular verse caught my eye with two words, knowledge and understanding. I believe early in life we possess a larger amount of these gifts than we believe but we're too scared to take hold of truth because we are aware of our supposed mental frailty. I personally struggle with faith in my ability to make decisions and take the necessary big steps in life. My reasoning is simple: How could I ever have the knowledge and understanding to have an impact on this earth and fulfill my place in the great puzzle? Shouldn't others lead me and show me where to go; they have lived longer and seen more so they are better prepared to lead my steps.
Yet here Solomon is teaching that claiming the knowledge and understanding from within our heart is accepting the words from our God's mouth. This may come off as arrogant and it shoves us onto the unstable ground of trusting our relationship with Christ but isn't that the point? If you always follow and obey the elders before you, at what point in time do you follow and obey Jesus? This isn't an attack on mentoring or leadership, its a call for leaders to do what they know is right no matter what someone may say is wrong. You always learn more doing something yourself rather than following another's lead. Its always safer to follow but the reward is greater to take a chance and step out on faith in yourself and your gifts. Fear of failure is a lost cause in itself because the moment you allow fear to take hold you have already failed.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
November
Her parents named her November on a warm day in May. The room smelled of cigarettes and sweat. The doctor referred to himself as Jack Daniels and he spoke with a Spanish accent. When her face was wiped clean and her mother was quiet, Jack said she was beautiful.
It started to rain.
November grew up in a trailor park outside of Tuscon, playing frisbee with paper plates and chewed up doggie dishes. She smiled a lot and her only friend was a boy named Sam. He was two years younger and wet his pants when he got excited. They played till the sun went down and crept home past Old Man Wither's trailor. It was blue with a yellow stained roof.
On her thirteenth birthday she ran away and hitch hiked to Las Vegas. She had seen the lights in a magazine once. An old woman the locals called Betty invited her into her one room apartment and fixed her eggs for breakfast. November went to school during the day and worked as a cocktail waitress in a strip club at night. She was a pretty girl and nobody cared that she was sixteen.
A jar full of money and three years later November enrolled in a small community college in Detroit. She loved the smell of gasoline and the colors of the city. She was drawn to the grey in the eyes of everyone. They smiled when she smiled. Four years of papers and coffee and November was a teacher.
Alone in her apartment one night she made a promise to the ceiling. She was going to gather a small group of children and devote her life to teaching them all she knew. They wouldn't be special or pretty or smart or stupid.
Her classroom was full with sixteen kids between the ages of four and six. They started with finger paints and picture books. It snowed a lot but the teacher was always there. No child was the same except for the twins who were very different. They spent Monday talking about love, Tuesday discussing truth, Wednesday laughing at intelligence, Thursday crying about fear, and on Friday they played frisbee.
November was there for everything. She cried through graduation. She cooked chili for tail-gate parties. She drank at weddings. She drank after divorces. She held children. She watched them sing in church. She drove them to the tatoo parlor. She went for Starbuck's. She ate McDonald's hotcakes. She went fishing. She practiced ballet. She watched movies at 12 am. She loved them all.
And one day she decided to leave. They came together and they begged her not to go. November kissed them on the forehead and said, "love and teach the world as I have loved and taught you". A rusted taxi took her away to a small town in Florida.
The children looked at each other with tears in their eyes. Someone tried to make a joke. It was funny but nobody laughed. Slowly they parted and went back home. They ate Thanksgiving dinner together two months later. One of the children quoted November and someone said she was wrong. They argued for hours. They began to say terrible things to each other. Hatred was born in their family. Groups started to form as people took sides. They pointed fingers and called each other liars. Everyone knew what November had said. And everyone else was wrong.
They broke away and never spoke again. Their families got larger and they built mansions to have their meetings. November's name was all over the country. They celebrated their knowledge and the others' stupidity. A young man once tried to enter but he didn't have on a Detroit Tiger's jersey so they didn't let him in. The outside was for him. The children ran their mansions thanking December for her knowledge and love. They loved a forgotten name.
The world started to burn in a huge fire one day. People died and cursed the earth. Everyone was scarred and disgusting. The children laughed at the outsiders stupidity and claimed November's knowledge was not for them. They laughed with money in their pockets and food in their bellies.
November sat on a small beach and stared at the water. The waves were blue like Old Man Wither's house. She sat and listened to the world fall away and wander in the dark. The children forgot her love and all her teachings. November wept on a warm day in May.
It started to rain.
November grew up in a trailor park outside of Tuscon, playing frisbee with paper plates and chewed up doggie dishes. She smiled a lot and her only friend was a boy named Sam. He was two years younger and wet his pants when he got excited. They played till the sun went down and crept home past Old Man Wither's trailor. It was blue with a yellow stained roof.
On her thirteenth birthday she ran away and hitch hiked to Las Vegas. She had seen the lights in a magazine once. An old woman the locals called Betty invited her into her one room apartment and fixed her eggs for breakfast. November went to school during the day and worked as a cocktail waitress in a strip club at night. She was a pretty girl and nobody cared that she was sixteen.
A jar full of money and three years later November enrolled in a small community college in Detroit. She loved the smell of gasoline and the colors of the city. She was drawn to the grey in the eyes of everyone. They smiled when she smiled. Four years of papers and coffee and November was a teacher.
Alone in her apartment one night she made a promise to the ceiling. She was going to gather a small group of children and devote her life to teaching them all she knew. They wouldn't be special or pretty or smart or stupid.
Her classroom was full with sixteen kids between the ages of four and six. They started with finger paints and picture books. It snowed a lot but the teacher was always there. No child was the same except for the twins who were very different. They spent Monday talking about love, Tuesday discussing truth, Wednesday laughing at intelligence, Thursday crying about fear, and on Friday they played frisbee.
November was there for everything. She cried through graduation. She cooked chili for tail-gate parties. She drank at weddings. She drank after divorces. She held children. She watched them sing in church. She drove them to the tatoo parlor. She went for Starbuck's. She ate McDonald's hotcakes. She went fishing. She practiced ballet. She watched movies at 12 am. She loved them all.
And one day she decided to leave. They came together and they begged her not to go. November kissed them on the forehead and said, "love and teach the world as I have loved and taught you". A rusted taxi took her away to a small town in Florida.
The children looked at each other with tears in their eyes. Someone tried to make a joke. It was funny but nobody laughed. Slowly they parted and went back home. They ate Thanksgiving dinner together two months later. One of the children quoted November and someone said she was wrong. They argued for hours. They began to say terrible things to each other. Hatred was born in their family. Groups started to form as people took sides. They pointed fingers and called each other liars. Everyone knew what November had said. And everyone else was wrong.
They broke away and never spoke again. Their families got larger and they built mansions to have their meetings. November's name was all over the country. They celebrated their knowledge and the others' stupidity. A young man once tried to enter but he didn't have on a Detroit Tiger's jersey so they didn't let him in. The outside was for him. The children ran their mansions thanking December for her knowledge and love. They loved a forgotten name.
The world started to burn in a huge fire one day. People died and cursed the earth. Everyone was scarred and disgusting. The children laughed at the outsiders stupidity and claimed November's knowledge was not for them. They laughed with money in their pockets and food in their bellies.
November sat on a small beach and stared at the water. The waves were blue like Old Man Wither's house. She sat and listened to the world fall away and wander in the dark. The children forgot her love and all her teachings. November wept on a warm day in May.
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